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Saturday, August 1, 2009

The end of one thing, the beginning of another

summer's last rose

***

It is a grey, windy day. I walked over to Golden Gate Park which is positively overrun by people going to see the Tutankhamen exhibit at the de Young museum. The cars clog every sidewalk curb and jam themselves like puzzle pieces in the small intersections.

I went to the park to see what I could find. Actually, I needed to find something for a project (for lack of a better word) and then I saw this little rose, just hiding next to a curb.

I gave this blossom a story: that it was either waiting to be discovered or waiting to crumble.

Next week, K and the kids are moving to their new home. I can't even tell you how much drama there has been this week in their little lives, all of it through circumstance, and it seems like an unfair punctuation mark to a story that has been so sad, even though the move is going to happen. I just wish their last days here had been easier or that I could have done more.

And then it dawned on me that I won't be seeing these faces again like I have been, every week, for months. It feels like yet another loss, not so sad because I know that they are moving on to bigger and better things and the way they're living now is so unsustainable and difficult, but it's still a loss all the same.

I will miss them. But unlike this little rose that no one else will notice, I hope that K and the kids know that they are noticed, and just as beautiful.

13 comments:

LouDuk August 1, 2009 at 6:58 PM  

I am at a loss for words. That was beautiful.

smith kaich jones August 1, 2009 at 7:51 PM  

Julie - It feels like a year of losses and imminent losses, and empty spaces. This rose in a previously rose-less place is a sign, a gift for you to find. And you did. I thought of you & K & the kids the other day - a woman here in much the same situation was on the news. She'd had to wait no time for help, had a place to stay in 2 days, and was there on tv thanking people. It seemed unfair that it was quickly remedied here, and y'all had to fight so hard. But fairness is not a part of life, and the bond you have formed with K & the kids will be there forever. I can't wait to hear the kids talk of this 10 years from now.

Take care. I think of you often.

:) Debi

Adam August 1, 2009 at 8:02 PM  

please please please keep me in the loop on the move! i am excited!

PixieDust August 1, 2009 at 8:08 PM  

Wow... I'm absolutely speechless at the poignancy of this post, and K's story...

I wish all of you happines.

Well-wishes,
Me

Susan L August 1, 2009 at 8:58 PM  

Julie- It is great that K and the kids are going to be in there own place soon. I would love to hear if you could keep us updated and if we can help them out if they need any furnishings. I am so sorry for your grandmother. I know she is looking down from heaven and smiling while knowing she has a great granddaughter.

God bless you.

Susan

robin-bird August 1, 2009 at 10:07 PM  

sweet grief, it is the gift that reminds me i am alive and want to be so. it is the opposite of despair which dull with emptiness. grief is on fire and filled with love. i love this tattered pink rose, so like you to find something beautiful in the most unlikely of places. you see a dying rose as a the rising phoenix. other see it as just an old rose in need of being pulled away from it's misplaced roots. i'll live your story any day.
XO

Just Jules August 1, 2009 at 10:12 PM  

oh but this is the best kind of sadness. a loss of our own in which someone gains so much more!

Carol August 2, 2009 at 3:37 AM  

I wish K and her lovely children all the best for the future... they deserve happiness and stability and a happy home!

This has been quite a remarkable journey.

Marilyn Miller August 2, 2009 at 6:38 PM  

Best wishes are sent on a wing and a prayer to K and her children. I wish them well in their new adventure. I hope there will be a way to keep contact with them from time to time. You have been a rose in their life of thorns.

Char August 2, 2009 at 6:45 PM  

so exciting it's almost here but I'm sure sad too. *hugs* honey

Relyn August 4, 2009 at 11:26 AM  

Of course they know that. It's your gift. Noticing, seeing, letting people know they have been seen, noticed.

Andi August 4, 2009 at 8:30 PM  

Julie, did I miss the list of things to help them get settled into their new place?

Michael Reardon August 5, 2009 at 3:38 AM  

I've spent the last, oh I don't know, hour? going back and reading all of your posts about K and her story.

It really REALLY makes me wish that I had started my blog three months ago so that I could have seen this sooner and done something to help.

It feels like reading a sad book with a happy ending now.

My email is godsmike@sbcglobal.net

Email me if there is anything still to do that I can help with.

Anything at all.