Ablution

At 3am on Sunday morning, I woke up to the sound of rain pelting against the windows of my bedroom. So much water this weekend: tears, mist, fog, rain, being very aware of the great expanse of the Pacific Ocean so near to my house. The rain this past Sunday was really powerful; big fat drops that streaked and splattered across the windows. There are more storms predicted this week and I'm looking forward to them.

The hard rain made me feel a lot calmer. Your thoughts and wishes and advice did too.

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I am learning that events like this past weekend that cause introspection end up being so helpful to me, even if they are very difficult or very sad events. They are catalysts for change, focus and direction (or redirection), and in my life, I'm trying to always be open to change. These times feel to me like being in a very dark room, not knowing what's in there, afraid you might bump into some furniture and maybe even hurt yourself. And you grope around in the dark and then you find the light switch on the wall, and in an instant, you flood the room with light.

And then you can see what is before you and around you. Then you can decide if you like what's in the room, if you want to move the furniture around, or if you want to throw everything away and start over. Even if you turn the light off again, at least you know what's in that room.

***

Obviously I don't have any more answers to my big questions than I did a few days ago, but I do have a great support system and a mind that doesn't stop working, which to me are very good things indeed.

I remembered one of my favorite scenes from one of my favorite movies. I won't say that I get all of my life advice from Woody Allen, but there are times when I certainly can relate.

Eternity is really long, especially near the end.--Woody Allen