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Thursday, May 14, 2009

A tsetse fly stole my iPhone

Phylum: Arthropoda
Subsection: Calyptratae
Superfamily: Hippoboscoidea

***

I have to write this post very quickly before I become narcoleptic again. It happens so suddenly these days.

But for the record:

I AM TIRED OF NAPS.
I HATE TEA.

Other than that, life is peachy.

***

When I was in grade school, there was a National Geographic or NOVA program that made quite an impression on me. It must have been about Africa, or bugs, or bad things that happen to people in Africa when around certain kinds of bugs because that is when I learned about the tsetse fly and sleeping sickness, otherwise known as Human African trypanosomiasis.

I especially became enamored of the word tsetse (you know how little kids are) and although I don't ever intend to get sleeping sickness and obviously I wouldn't wish this disease on anyone, whenever I catch one of these little colds that renders me unconscious for days in a row, I just figure I've been bitten by a tsetse fly's lesser cousin.

To the extent that my imaginary tsetse fly bite has made me cognitively useless for an entire week so far, I also could not find my cell phone for a solid day. I figured that the fly stole it, but then hours later I found the phone hiding in my bed between my duvet and my blankie.

(Yes, this is one of those silly posts that I occasionally write when in altered mental states caused by various illnesses. Normally I would go full on into Woody Allen mode right now, like this post or this post but today I am leaning more towards science. I wish I could write a real post today but that is not to be... I will have to blame my dearth of ideas on the tsetse fly as well.)

And on that note, I am off to make my 250th cup of tea.

xoxo

13 comments:

~DokterKenny May 14, 2009 at 7:04 PM  

Lullabye..go to sleep
Rest your head little Tango
Go to bed now ..set your iPhone down
and we'll see you in the morn!

_ _
/
zzzzz

shabby girl May 14, 2009 at 7:26 PM  

Don't kid yourself! The tsetse did it! Little bugger!
Hoping you feel better soon!

Unknown May 14, 2009 at 7:27 PM  

I was in Africa a couple years ago, and my leaders were very strict about us letting our clothes hang on the line after dark when we did laundry. Apparently the tsetse fly hides in the clothes during the night because they like the cloth, and then they get you when you put the clothes on.

Not sure if that's true, but we were all careful to take our clothes down, anyway.

Char May 14, 2009 at 8:11 PM  

feel better soon sweets

iasa May 14, 2009 at 8:22 PM  

according to peter falk in The In-laws 'the giant tsetse flies came and carried the children away'

so everytime we lose something we blame it on them, it probably was a tsetse fly borrowing your mobile.

Hope you feel better

Brook May 14, 2009 at 8:22 PM  

I must tell you honestly and ummmm 4 sheets to the wind, that I enjoy the tsetse fly posts and the dating tips and stuff as much as the "I live Here" posts. I live in my own whirlpool of real life and wonder enough about the perils of single motherhood all on my own. Not nearly ecstatic but never abusive. Being in a place of sugahdaddy land-read that how you will-I explore the internet for the picture of not what I would rather... or if only...(I have explored well...lots of possibilities...)but rather a breath of fresh aira nd a different perspective on my imaginings. I must say that your pursuit of your wishes dreams and desires-your foibles falls and trials(work related or not)are fodder for my imagination-providing me new and interesting dreamscapes. Dark Rum Rickeys do not compare to even the cheapest of whiskey rickeys if you were wondering. Toddies should be rethunk I think. Well. I hope you feel better soon. Take care of your own damn self. You need it too.

julochka May 14, 2009 at 11:08 PM  

oh yay! our favorite old science girl TB is back, even if she does have a cold! hope you're feeling better soon. and for goodness' sake, don't lose your iPhone!!!

xox,
/j

will May 14, 2009 at 11:12 PM  

I think there's a flyswatter Apple App. Probably a phone homing beacon too.

And, don't hate tea, just change the tea bag!

SE'LAH... May 15, 2009 at 2:54 AM  

Love this post! My kinda thoughts.

Feel better soon. Sending lots of positive vibes your way.

Gabby May 15, 2009 at 9:25 AM  

You got sideswiped by the virulent bureaucratic, politically indifferent, universally fear-hearted, non-disarmament bug, a ferocious Genus Brachinus of the larger family of the bombardier beetle now morphed into men in suits that troll the city day and night looking to pick off loving souls and inject apathy into their veins. You need a double tanker-truck of tea, a ribbon of love that wraps itself thrice about the globe and then curls about your sickbed, and golden beams of delicious kindness to restore your strength. Oh, and a spoon of honey won't hurt, either. Humor, however, is the first sign of recovery.

Anonymous May 15, 2009 at 9:53 AM  

My mom believes that the cure for absolutely EVERYTHING is a shot of tequila.

That being said, you are talking to the Nap Queen here. Since you are such a scientific, social working, swirl of activity most of the time, listen to your inner nursery teacher and take your naps as directed.

PS - As much as I love and am inspired by your K stories and civic activities, I miss the magical meanderings and inspired take on the completely mundane.

Operaton You May 15, 2009 at 10:17 AM  

At least you blame on it a fly, I used to blame it on touching door knobs after using a public bathroon! LOL! I have had every imaginable disease in my mind until my internal doctor told me i needed a specialist, A psychologist! Do hope you feel better soon!

Andi May 15, 2009 at 11:01 AM  

First I have to say that I loved Gabby's comment! I guess you had your phone on silent? Otherwise you could have called yourself to hear where it is? I have done that!
I hope you feel better soon! My husband has the same bug, I am isolating him so I don't get sick on my vacation!!!