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Thursday, August 21, 2008

One of My Better Work-Related Emails

Mom strikes again (and NO, it's not my job. Supposedly we have someone employed here called an office manager).


8/22, 2:22 PM

Hi guys,

The refrigerator has undergone a massively overdue cleaning and restocking.

I am guessing that most questionable/possible Bio-Hazard items have been destroyed, including the hairy carrots (you know who you are).

The ancient yogurts (dated April), emaciated blueberries, Ming Dynasty-era Chinese food and very odd-looking shriveled Camembert (that was what the label said it was) have gone to the giant landfill in the sky.

Let’s start things anew and keep our little refrigerator pretty.


ps. If I did throw out your lunch accidentally, I apologize.


pps. I accidentally did throw out someone's lunch, but he did agree that it was stinky and gross.


paris parfait August 21, 2008 at 3:51 PM  

Ha ha! I know a few offices like that. Oops, better look in my own refrigerator. xoxox

Christina August 21, 2008 at 3:54 PM  

Wow! Thank you for pointing that previous post out to me. Wow!! I like your style!

What's so hard about ppl throwing away a lunch or taking it home the day they don't eat it?!

These folks need to hear my- there are children in Africa starving speech!

: )

Anonymous August 21, 2008 at 5:58 PM  

Hairy carrots!!! LOL

Anonymous August 21, 2008 at 11:49 PM  

ah, such a witty email.. shame that our emails about the state of the canteen and fridge aren't as witty. They're usually scathing and threatening to take the facility away from us *lol*

Anonymous August 22, 2008 at 6:59 AM  

lol, the pps was adorably funny. love it

margie August 22, 2008 at 7:16 AM  

we had a rotating calendar and on fridays a two man team would clean out the fridge. if it did not get done, monday morning an email was sent to all the staff pointing a finger at the two misfits who hadn't done their job and everyone would write nasty nasty emails back to the two of them. it was hilarious, but it worked. everyone bonded. it was fun and the fridge was clean most of the time.

willow August 22, 2008 at 7:51 AM  

Yep. When it gets the fuzzy green hat, it's time to go.

tangobaby August 22, 2008 at 10:43 AM  

Hi paris parfait,

I'm sure many are...and to be honest, my refrigerator isn't much better, but shhh...don't tell anyone.

Hi christina,

What I find even more frustrating is that our "office manager" is always talking about how she is on top of what's in the frig.

Hi johanna,

They were baby carrots that were actually growing little white beards!

Hi carol,

I did get some great responses, and one that just said "bless you." So although the people here at work don't get to benefit from my blog, at least I can share some wisdom with them via email once in a while.

It sounds like the place where you work needs a little humor injection!

Hi sarah,

I felt very badly that I had tossed his lunch, but I have to be fair and say that I asked two other people what they thought about the scary tupperware and they agreed it was dangerous.

I also explained to the guy that had he brought his smelly lunch out into the open air of the office, the repercussions would have been much worse.

Hi margie,

I think we like to bond here by being funny and sarcastic. I am not sure if we are the "pitching in" types unless we were allowed to gripe freely.

But I'm glad it worked in your office!

Hi willow,

Thank god I did not see mold sculptures or else the email would have been much more vitriolic! Green hats! Eeewww.

Abbey August 23, 2008 at 11:32 PM  


Just wait till I can tell stories about my new job and their fridge. I refuse to even look at it, let alone clean it out!!